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Your Pet's Behavior

Updated: Nov 16, 2019

What is my pet's behavior telling me?

Have you ever wondered what your pet's behavior is telling you? Why does she stare at you like that? Why does he seem to hate your new boyfriend? Why do your dogs stop getting along every time family visits?

Well, guess what? These "signs" are actually messages from your pet! Your pet is doing everything she/he can to get you to pay attention.

Here are a few examples of messages animals give to their people:

•The dog keeps barking at everyone walking by his home. As crazy as it sounds, it could be a message to his human that she needs to be more social and stop pushing others away for fear of getting hurt.

•A cat made his human feel like the most special, most loved human in the world. This could be how the cat is helping his human to know what unconditional love really feels like.

•A bird started pulling his feathers out obsessively. This could be the bird's way of reflecting her human's anxiety back to her.

So I ask, are you paying attention to what the animal in your life wants you to know? If you can look at this animal as your teacher, you'll be able to figure out what he/she is trying to teach you.

The animals in our lives are so connected to us and the environment that they understand how we feel at our deepest level. They are our therapists, our teachers, our mentors and our trainers. They know when we are sad about a break up or if you’re having trouble standing up for yourself at work. We just need to listen.

We can tap into their wisdom and I’m not just referring to our pets. This is true with all animals, farm, wild or domestic.


My dog Olso whom I raised for the Seeing Eye, has always had an issue with going up stairs. While he did pass his formal training, he was difficult to match with a blind person. After over a year of trying to find the right match for Oslo, it was time for him to be released from the Seeing Eye. As the puppy raiser, I could take him back. So of course I did. I had always had an extra special bond with him. More so than with the other puppies I raised that went on to guide. During the first year he was back with me his stair issue got worse and worse. When I asked him why, the answer I got from him was fear because of a time when he fell. I have since realized that I misunderstood his message. Being an animal communicator isn’t an exact science. We can and do make mistakes, especially when it’s about us. His issue was not about going down stairs, but going up. My issue for many years has been about “making it” in a chosen profession...going UP THE STAIRS to success. Over the past three-six months I’ve been doing a lot of inner work on myself. This has included doing energy clearing (which I offer to others) on myself as well as working with a clearing partner. Since I’ve been doing the clearings, which included a few on Oslo, his issue with the stairs has greatly improved. I’ve noticed when I’m feeling better about my direction, he’s better with the stairs. When I'm feeling stuck, he’s stuck at the bottom of the stairs whining. What an amazing teacher Oslo has been for me.

When I decided it was time to sharpen my skills as a medium, I trained and mentored with two amazing women here in NJ. After several years of mediumship, I decided I wanted to work more with animals. I found a communicator to train with. I finished all of Val’s wonderful course work and went on to do many readings. Last year I found the amazing Danielle MacKinnon. If you are interested in connecting with your pet or the wild animals in your backyard that make a mess of your garden, then get Danielle’s book Animal Lessons: discovering your spiritual connection with animals. She also has an online course that is worth doing if you’re so inclined.

What’s the lesson?

First you have to identify the lesson, which could be a bit tricky. Danielle explains the steps in great detail, but here it is in a nutshell. First you’re looking at the behavior of the animal that you want to be corrected. Through a series of questions answered honestly, you can dig up your feelings about the animal. For example how I feel about Oslo whining and walking in circles at the bottom of the stairs (annoyed) This is especially annoying since my house is a split-level with several sets of six steps. But, I also love my furry companion deeply. The negative and the positive feelings can open your eyes about a belief you have about yourself.

Just about every negative behavior comes down to these simple beliefs that the human has. *I’m not good enough *I’m not safe, supported or protected *I’m not worthy or deserving *I’m not lovable

For me with Oslo’s stair issue, it’s “I’m not good enough”. Like any of these limiting beliefs we hold inside, they all go back to our childhood years. I very common self-love issue for many of us that could be centered around career or money (or something else) beliefs now. Animals don’t emotionally impact us by accident. Every action they show us is part of a plan to help us evolve to being a better human-being. When we finally get the message, both the human and the animal benefit in all aspects of our lives.

What do I do now with this belief?

Changing a negative belief can be tough. This is where your awareness comes in to first recognize your “walk-arounds” and then make better choices. “Walk-arounds” are our particular patterns of behavior. For example, if someone tells me of a career success they had I would of course congratulate them on their success. But underneath I feel a pang of jealousy and say to myself, why her and not me. This is where the awareness comes in. Feeling the jealousy and going with my pattern of having an inner pitty party, is my “walk-around”.

If I can recognize this belief pattern, I can change it. It’s my choice how I want to feel. Instead I could not only congratulate the person, I could then ask what her what steps did she take to reach that particular success and make a plan to try it myself. This way I’m empowering myself to change that pattern and change the belief that “I’m not good enough” to be successful. Make sense?

Here are a few sampling of “walk-arounds” Danielle lists in her book.

  • Over giving to others in order to prove how good you are.

  • Flying under the radar so that no one can find you to support you, so you avoid disappointment.

  • Sacrificing your own needs to prove you’re a lovable person.

  • Isolating yourself because you don’t feel worthy of the love of others.

How you choose to change a negative belief is up to you, but make those choices in a clear, calm state of mind. After figuring out all the choices you can think of, pick one or more to see if they work. But remember, the choice(s) you decide on may have no bearing on your success. It’s all about the intention behind the choice(s).

Mastery of our relationships.

My choice of not feeling that pang of jealousy has changed to me trying other people’s advice as well as coming up with my own creative ideas. Has this helped Oslo? Yes. Are we both “cured”, no. We’re not there yet, but we’ve both made improvement. The biggie for Oslo was when he went up the long flight of stairs in my daughter’s house without me putting the leash on him to get him to go upstairs. Oslo was totally on his own. I was so shocked that you could have knocked me over with a feather.

When and if I master my negative beliefs, will all our issues be gone? No, because new challenges will surface and Oslo or other animal(s) will be there to help me realize what thoughts and emotions aren’t serving me.

Lessons from our animal friends.

In Danielle’s book, she shares a list of animal species and their common theme of the lessons they are teaching us. Here are two.

Dog: negative belief: My life is always out of my control. I feel chaos all the time. embodiment: Dogs thrive when their community and home is in balance. This includes having a balanced, clear leader, whether that leader is human or animal. lesson: I’m in control of my life. I’m a leader in my life. I’m strong and protective of myself.

Cat: negative belief: I need love and approval of others to make me feel better embodiment: Cats embody independence. They decide when they want affection or not. They call the shots in their life with confidence. lesson: I’m capable. I’m awesome. I do things beautifully on my own.

If you’re curious about the behavior of the animals in your life, then get Danielle’s book, Animal Lessons: discovering your spiritual connection with animals. She offers some freebies when you buy the book. If you don’t have pets, maybe you’ve got a pesty squirrel or other wild animal driving you crazy. The book is helpful for all animals.

Note: I'll only recommend books, or anything else for that matter, that I feel has great value.

Namaste' Stephanie

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